My thanks to Cam Hutchinson for supporting this creation. Cheers DJW

Monday, April 21, 2008

Father Knows Best

I saw a TV Show with a bunch of old white men in funny clothes praying for divine intervention and wasn’t sure if it was about the Pope’s visit or the Masters coverage.

The Pope used his address at Yankee Stadium to once again confront the allegations of sexual abuse apologizing to ball boys everywhere.

I thought the Pope picked an interesting place to talk about the evils of contraception, standing on the pitchers rubber.

The UFC says 21,000 fans prove the UFC should be allowed in Canada and begs the question how many tickets would we need to sell to get Gladiators back?

Dancia Patrick won a Formula 1 race when the leading drivers had to pit but who among us wouldn’t run out of gas with Dancia?

By releasing Frank Thomas and having to pay him nearly $7 million to not play I guess it’s the bottom line that gets the big hurt.

Watching the fake Gladiator open their pre-game ceremony was it really necessary for the Ottawa Senators to hire an actor to fall on the sword?

After being caught on a Nazi-Bondage tape F-1 head Max Mosley says he will retire in 2009 because he has a few loose ends to tie up.

Former Tour de France champion Jan Ullrich agreed to pay a fine of over $1 million to settle allegations of drug charges which will require him to pedal a lot of steroids.

I guess the charges against Ullrich were pumped up after all.

If the US Government would just fine the athletes who are guilty of taking illegal drugs they could probably pay off the national debt.

Mike Millbury of the Toronto Sports Network (TSN) says Alex Ovechkin is playing like a dog and if anyone knows how to spot and sign dogs it’s him.

They should call him “Mute” because it’s what we do to the TV when he comes on.

The LA Lakers will be playing the Denver Nuggets in the NBA playoffs which means Kobe Bryant can join the mile high club on the way to the mile high city.


The last time Kobe spent any time in Denver he was charged with harassment so I guess his wife is shopping for more diamonds.

Harry Sindon says his star defenseman Zdeno Chara has a rib injury and also told his daughter’s date she gets really friendly after a few drinks.