Textbook pass

If the Canucks don’t win the Cup it will be the second time in a couple months Vancouverites were forced to cancel their rapture. Could you imagine if the Canucks lose and the next rapture (October 21st tickets still available) comes? Going from living in a city most consider heaven on earth to a life time of being in heaven but forever knowing your team blew a 2 game lead in the Stanley Cup Finals. That would be hell.

Winnipeg officials are looking into allegations of corruption in the season ticket auction when it was discovered profiteers bought tickets. Among those getting tickets ahead of loyal Jets fans are Bernie Madoff, OJ Simpson and Seth Bladder. A spokesman for Conrad Black was interested in purchasing tickets and had to wait until after lockdown to see if his bookie was able to get them.

People are questioning the defense suggestion in the DSM assault trial, that the 32 yr old woman agreed to consensual sex with an aging, balding, pudgy man within minutes of seeing him. Sources close to the team of lawyers say they plan to introduce evidence DSM told her he was a professional a curler which also explains testimony of the victim who said he kept yelling hurry… hard.

The Alberta Government was rocked with allegations of preferential treatment in health care when a former director’s words and memo’s from his time in the health care system, pointed to MLA’s moving their friends and family to the front of treatment wait lists. A spokesman for the Calgary Flames was critical saying like inoculations the team was assured they came 1st.

People across Canada are outraged that packages to those serving for little pay on the front line may be affected by the postal strike. This includes both the armed forces care packages and a CFL players training camp emergency food rations from home. At 1st the spokesman for the Canadian Football Players Association was up in arms over the postage strike until he was assured it wouldn’t affect the players’ food stamps.

Stripping the BCS title away from the USC Trojans is harsh man it is like taking away the Tierra from the toddler. It is ironic the length of time it took to strip away the title as usually a Trojan falls right off.

Apple introduced the iCloud today. Was excited until I realized I had it misspelled, I thought it was iclod. Isn’t keeping important information in a space with continuous access what an attic is for?

I wonder if the Winnipeg Jets will claim the new $1000 hiring credit for new employees from the federal budget. Talk about sucking up to Manitoba all Quebec got was a bridge, a couple billion for a 15 year old tax adjustment and a whole new group of wealthy retirees on a MP’s pension.

The Montreal Canadians are producing a public message to remind fans everyone is special. The video is a response to recent claims the Smurfs were not small cute cartoons but rather a tool for hatred and Nazi propaganda and the Canadians decided to avert any bad publicity from their roster.