Moat Point

It has been alleged the NHL was in control of the Phoenix Coyotes since last November thus adding fire to the rumour Gary Bettman wanted to stop any Canadian team from winning the Stanley Cup by trading Ollie Joiken to Calgary.

Seeing Brian Mulroney, Jim Balsillie and Gary Bettman going to court to protect their good names is a lot like going to a brothel to protect your virginity.

A court has given the Washington Redskins the right to use their name despite opposition from Native groups who say the name is an insult to them. This clears the way for the name of a potential NHL franchise in Ontario to be called the really really really white skins.

The lack of playoff hockey for Canadians along with the troubles Jim Balsillie has bringing a team to Ontario is the focus of a new reality TV show “Hockey Not in Canada”.

Despite only 100 people showing up for a Save the Coyotes rally the NHL was ecstatic saying actual paid attendance was well over 16,000.

The NHL says they have plans to move the Coyotes to Winnipeg ahead of Hamilton. Of course Honolulu Hawaii, Waco Texas and Acapulco Mexico are ahead of Winnipeg.

A report out from Washington said briefings on the war in Iraq for the President contained verses from the Bible. This is similar to verses found in most NFL playbooks advising them to go forth and multiply.

Michael Vick has been released to a half way house but the restrictions imposed will keep him on a short leash. About all he can do is sit around the house, walk to his probation officer and fetch his paper.

Roger Goddel has come out strongly against betting on NFL games and gave the chances of it becoming legal at best 2:1 odds.

Michael Phelps says he wants to compete in more events in the future but as of now it is only a pipe dream.

Mediation talks between the NHL and representatives from the Phoenix Coyotes took a strange turn when the mediator suggested potential owner Jim Balsillie just fly the 100 hardcore Phoenix fans to Hamilton for each game.

The Frenchmen in charge of the International Swimming Federation have rejected over 40% of the designs of competitive swim suits. They demanded manufacturers make changes to the suits and have them modeled at a later date preferably by women from the SI Swimsuit Edition.

Officials say they are contemplating extreme changes to swimsuits including banning zippers, less permeable fabric and outlawing Quebec tourists from wearing Speedos while watching beach volleyball.

Top 3 reasons to watch TSN2

# 3 Twice as many Toronto losses in prime time

# 2 Constant updates from TSN1

# 1 You can’t remember when to hold them or fold them

What are the chances of Michael Vick getting a show on Spike TV?

Cultural differences were in evidence this week when an English politician resigned over reports he used taxpayer money to clean his moat while NHL owners who receive millions in taxpayer support applauded Commissioner Gary Bettman for trying to erect one around the Phoenix Coyotes.

The NHL is still claiming they have additional suitors for the Phoenix Coyotes and still haven’t met with all the referrals from Match.com.