My thanks to Cam Hutchinson for supporting this creation. Cheers DJW

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Hitting the High Note

Researchers say they have discovered an alarming increase in the amount of estrogen in the water. This is having an effect on male reproduction, muscle mass and the high pitched voices of sports announcers.

I feel bad for my dog because every time the Flames score the announcer on Sportsnet gets so excited my dog comes running home.

A study has shown children’s gestures early in life can predict success. This is especially true for children of professional basketball players as being able to pick their daddy out of a line-up increases the chance he will pay child support.

The University of Calgary will have access to the biggest telescope ever when it is launched later this year. Officials say the telescope is so powerful if you focus it carefully you can see the chance the Leafs have of winning the Stanley Cup again.

The RCMP will review its use of tazers after a number of incidents have questioned the safety of the device; however Leafs GM Brian Burke says it is still an option when the player has a no trade clause.

Bud Selig chastising A-Rod over his steroid use is like Bernie Madeoff saying his $50 billion fraud is the fault of his secretary for getting breast implants.

An expert panel says fighting should be removed from hockey at all levels. The toughest sell will be with Jr. Teams, the NHL and minor hockey parents in the stands.

Toronto coach Wilson being considered as the coach for next year’s Olympic team and to show he is up to the challenge is already calling out Roberto Luongo for letting in soft goals.

I think we should get Oilers GM Ron Lowe to be a part of the Olympic selection process with Leafs GM Brian Burke. I keep hearing GM’s say a little fighting is good for the game and this would be a great way to prove it.

Representatives from the International Olympic Committee have banned the group “Right to Play” from being a part of the 2010 Games in Vancouver. A spokesperson for the IOC says it conflicts with their “Pay to Play” focus.

I know it’s supportive and all but isn’t having your teammates behind you what started this whole steroids mess?

Top 5 signs your team has the wrong captain
# 5 The only closed door meeting he has had with players is over bong etiquette
# 4 Demands a chair like Captain Kirk for him on the sidelines
# 3 Takes the team to the movie Brokeback Mountain for a bit of bonding
# 2 Walks around with a parrot on his shoulder
# 1 Every year he plans his vacation to coincide with the beginning of playoffs