The International Association of Pole Dancers has applied to be an Olympic sport causing Vanoc to reply great just what we need something else to make it rain
Players from the NHL teams are back at work with most saying they spent their downtime somewhere warm, at the Winter Olympics
After throwing in the towel earlier this week the Canadian Olympic Committee says they need more Government support. More money for a group that claims they are inefficient and quit when there is the slightest trouble who do they think they are auto workers?
Female bob sledders have a similar area to the figure skaters “kiss and cry” only it’s called the “lift and pry”
American skier Lindsey Vonn broke her finger during a race and now has nothing to wrap all the male admirers around
Canadian Olympic gold medal winners say they will donate their bonuses to the needy which caused the CFL Players Association to say “thanks”
Health care given to the athletes and officials from the Olympics is really busy with officials saying the longest line-ups are for MRI’s, dental work and medical marijuana
Since almost all our medals are from the woman athletes’ maybe we should have called it “Own the Estrogen”
With the collapse of their financial system Greece is demanding the return of the Olympic flame saying they can’t get a decent riot started
World weather agencies are meeting to discuss the scandals with reporting of data. Among the items up for discussion creating accurate data, more open scrutiny and adding Olympic style costumes to their spins and twists
While nursing a bad chest cold Canadian skip Cheryl Bernard said rumours she had posed nude were a fabrication adding the only ones to see her nude were her husband and Dr. This was met with an avalanche of offers to help diagnose her cold.
Canadian women’s alternate curler Kristie Moore was called upon to take a shot this week prompting her to say it was good practice for her upcoming delivery with everyone yelling hurry... hurry...
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Column 10
Doctors in the US are demanding a recall of all hot dogs saying they pose a choking hazard and in a related topic Olympic hotdoggers are being checked for chocking during medal runs.
Over 50% of food vendors have been cited for violations at the Olympic Games which explains why even when curling isn’t on tap people can be heard yelling “Hurry... Hurry... Hard...”
Instead of going for gold many spectators seem to be going for... ever!
After seeing the ratings numbers for Tiger Woods apology the Canadian Olympic Officials are setting world records beating competitors to the “I’m sorry” microphone.
David Letterman and former President Bill Clinton were expected to be in attendance for some Olympic curling then they found out it was a different kind of in turn
Japan is blaming their poor performance in the bobsleigh on a sled made by Toyota before they began to go wildly out of control
Greece has broken out in riots over austerity measures caused by a massive budget deficit. Out of concern for public safety Greek officials are asking Canada to keep the Olympic flame for a while until they get the rioters under control.
Anyone who has tried to get around Vancouver without a map can sympathise with the coach of the Netherlands sending his athlete on the wrong lane
Parents at the Canada-Germany hockey game were telling their children the noise is Lou... not boo... and then the politicians came in and spoiled it...
Athletes and Olympic officials from all over the world are taking advantage of the free medical and dental available to them. This has created a new rallying call for the British athletes... “Brace yourself”
Over 50% of food vendors have been cited for violations at the Olympic Games which explains why even when curling isn’t on tap people can be heard yelling “Hurry... Hurry... Hard...”
Instead of going for gold many spectators seem to be going for... ever!
After seeing the ratings numbers for Tiger Woods apology the Canadian Olympic Officials are setting world records beating competitors to the “I’m sorry” microphone.
David Letterman and former President Bill Clinton were expected to be in attendance for some Olympic curling then they found out it was a different kind of in turn
Japan is blaming their poor performance in the bobsleigh on a sled made by Toyota before they began to go wildly out of control
Greece has broken out in riots over austerity measures caused by a massive budget deficit. Out of concern for public safety Greek officials are asking Canada to keep the Olympic flame for a while until they get the rioters under control.
Anyone who has tried to get around Vancouver without a map can sympathise with the coach of the Netherlands sending his athlete on the wrong lane
Parents at the Canada-Germany hockey game were telling their children the noise is Lou... not boo... and then the politicians came in and spoiled it...
Athletes and Olympic officials from all over the world are taking advantage of the free medical and dental available to them. This has created a new rallying call for the British athletes... “Brace yourself”
Column 9
Ski cross is a combination of skiing and the Red Cross coming to your rescue.
How good were the events I watched? I was having a hard time distinguishing the Swiss athletes from the medics.
I picking the US for speed in the broken leg repair, the Israelis get top marks for diagnosis and the Transylvanians gold in forensics...
Top 5 slogans for the 2014 Winter Olympic team
# 5 Podium Schmodium
# 4 After You...
# 3 Fighting for 4th or 5th
# 2 Own the Oxygen
# 1 Cheered by Canadians no matter the result
How good were the events I watched? I was having a hard time distinguishing the Swiss athletes from the medics.
I picking the US for speed in the broken leg repair, the Israelis get top marks for diagnosis and the Transylvanians gold in forensics...
Top 5 slogans for the 2014 Winter Olympic team
# 5 Podium Schmodium
# 4 After You...
# 3 Fighting for 4th or 5th
# 2 Own the Oxygen
# 1 Cheered by Canadians no matter the result
Column 8
Top 5 signs the figure skater is out of shape
# 5 Adds chocolate ice cream to his Gatorade
# 4 His tight size is XXXL
# 3 Stops before each jump to catch his breath
# 2 Took out a competitor with a sequin while doing up his jumpsuit
# 1 Names all his signature moves after donuts
Police at the Vancouver Games are being reminded the motto “To Serve and Protect” is not just for beer
In what has to be a 1st Virtue is in a position to be a medalist at the Games
Each Olympic sport has a key catch phrase. Hockey has goal, bobsleigh has run and ski cross has medic!
# 5 Adds chocolate ice cream to his Gatorade
# 4 His tight size is XXXL
# 3 Stops before each jump to catch his breath
# 2 Took out a competitor with a sequin while doing up his jumpsuit
# 1 Names all his signature moves after donuts
Police at the Vancouver Games are being reminded the motto “To Serve and Protect” is not just for beer
In what has to be a 1st Virtue is in a position to be a medalist at the Games
Each Olympic sport has a key catch phrase. Hockey has goal, bobsleigh has run and ski cross has medic!
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