As those of you know column 200 had my 1st hate letter... causing me joy.
I now have nothing to report after column 300.
Damn.
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
I'll Bareback
Nashville Predators received a lot of lucky bounces in the playoff with Vancouver Canucks. This was made easier when there was 179 “lucky bounces” recorded by playoff prognosticators. The Nashville ice was flooded no doubt due to the rivers rising in Memphis, which made the Game 6 ice resemble an indoor stock-car oval.
Top 5 signs the NHL ice has too much bounce
# 5 Linesman drops the puck and it springs over the netting.
# 4 You get a penalty for double dribbling
# 3 Ice described as having more bounce than a cheque from Boots Del Biaggio
# 2 Goaltenders trade to shortstop glove
# 1 The final score of the game was 30 – love.
I am a Calgary Flames fan so I was a bit pissed when Ric Nash leveled Michael Backland. Is the World Championships really the place to get your edge back? A late blindside hit to a defenseless player. Really Rick? That is your contribution to the World Championships? I know our teams are more accountable than in previous years, they don’t get locked up in jail before matches as much, I just think we expect more than gold at any cost. Canuck Up! The only thing you should leave your feet for in Slovakia is rats.
I picked Nashville to win and was the subject of much scorn from seasoned grizzled one foot on banana peel experts so I will Canuck Up. I though Nashville would surprise. They didn’t. Come on Sedins, you are now representing the hopes and dreams of my Canada… bring the Cup home to the true north.
Boy Thor sure has nothing on the way the NHL has brought the hammer down on head shots.
There will be a new feature for the Don Cherry Rock em Sock em videos in reaction to all the concussion controversy. From now on when you see a vicious head hit a computer program automatically calculate the loss of IQ and shows them on a special pop up screen. As a sidebar a lot of commentators were fighters.
Brock Lesnar has pulled out of his UFC 131 fight in Vancouver with an intestinal disorder as it appears even his stomach can’t stomach the steroids.
Seriously I would have bet the bull would have been thrown by the stuff coming out of Chad Ochocinco than vice versa. Lasting 1.5 seconds is about what I expected but I thought maybe if he could have done a few pus ups in the ring he might have amused the bull for a couple more seconds.
Chad and Bull sounds like a great English pub to get spotted dick
I know sports have removed steroids from the athletes, you can see how clean the MMA guys look, but I think someone has to test Jose Baltista again. For a guy that can hit the ball out of the park with each swing he looks like he needs a meal.
Not to say there was ever any doubt but looking at pictures of Chris Bosh and LeBron James from 2 years ago you have to wonder if they forgot their muscles when they took their talents to South Beach. I’m sure it is just the lighting in Miami but those pipes look a few inches smaller in diameter.
Now that I Canucked Up and am cheering for Vancouver I can’t help but notice they have 2 green men near the penalty box. Anyone else notice them? You will recognize what they look like if you have ever visited Vancouver as they don’t appear to have any money left in their pockets.
The Vancouver Canucks are trying new ways to increase their fan base. 1st they get Canada behind them for the playoffs and now they appear to be trying to get soccer fans to follow their diving.
Now that Donald Trump has decided not to run for president of the USA all of America will have to wait to see who the next hair apparent is.
I guess Arnold is regretting his latest slogan “I’ll be bareback”.
Jesse Lumsden is retiring from football although he says he can still be an effective runner. The problem is when he carries the mail he is usually delivered to an emergency.
When I was a kid in Saskatchewan the only games we could get on our radio was the Minnesota Twins and it is with sadness I learned of the death of Harmon Killebrew. I can’t remember how many home runs I hit pretending I was him but my bat was full of dings from the rocks I used as balls.
Top 5 signs the NHL ice has too much bounce
# 5 Linesman drops the puck and it springs over the netting.
# 4 You get a penalty for double dribbling
# 3 Ice described as having more bounce than a cheque from Boots Del Biaggio
# 2 Goaltenders trade to shortstop glove
# 1 The final score of the game was 30 – love.
I am a Calgary Flames fan so I was a bit pissed when Ric Nash leveled Michael Backland. Is the World Championships really the place to get your edge back? A late blindside hit to a defenseless player. Really Rick? That is your contribution to the World Championships? I know our teams are more accountable than in previous years, they don’t get locked up in jail before matches as much, I just think we expect more than gold at any cost. Canuck Up! The only thing you should leave your feet for in Slovakia is rats.
I picked Nashville to win and was the subject of much scorn from seasoned grizzled one foot on banana peel experts so I will Canuck Up. I though Nashville would surprise. They didn’t. Come on Sedins, you are now representing the hopes and dreams of my Canada… bring the Cup home to the true north.
Boy Thor sure has nothing on the way the NHL has brought the hammer down on head shots.
There will be a new feature for the Don Cherry Rock em Sock em videos in reaction to all the concussion controversy. From now on when you see a vicious head hit a computer program automatically calculate the loss of IQ and shows them on a special pop up screen. As a sidebar a lot of commentators were fighters.
Brock Lesnar has pulled out of his UFC 131 fight in Vancouver with an intestinal disorder as it appears even his stomach can’t stomach the steroids.
Seriously I would have bet the bull would have been thrown by the stuff coming out of Chad Ochocinco than vice versa. Lasting 1.5 seconds is about what I expected but I thought maybe if he could have done a few pus ups in the ring he might have amused the bull for a couple more seconds.
Chad and Bull sounds like a great English pub to get spotted dick
I know sports have removed steroids from the athletes, you can see how clean the MMA guys look, but I think someone has to test Jose Baltista again. For a guy that can hit the ball out of the park with each swing he looks like he needs a meal.
Not to say there was ever any doubt but looking at pictures of Chris Bosh and LeBron James from 2 years ago you have to wonder if they forgot their muscles when they took their talents to South Beach. I’m sure it is just the lighting in Miami but those pipes look a few inches smaller in diameter.
Now that I Canucked Up and am cheering for Vancouver I can’t help but notice they have 2 green men near the penalty box. Anyone else notice them? You will recognize what they look like if you have ever visited Vancouver as they don’t appear to have any money left in their pockets.
The Vancouver Canucks are trying new ways to increase their fan base. 1st they get Canada behind them for the playoffs and now they appear to be trying to get soccer fans to follow their diving.
Now that Donald Trump has decided not to run for president of the USA all of America will have to wait to see who the next hair apparent is.
I guess Arnold is regretting his latest slogan “I’ll be bareback”.
Jesse Lumsden is retiring from football although he says he can still be an effective runner. The problem is when he carries the mail he is usually delivered to an emergency.
When I was a kid in Saskatchewan the only games we could get on our radio was the Minnesota Twins and it is with sadness I learned of the death of Harmon Killebrew. I can’t remember how many home runs I hit pretending I was him but my bat was full of dings from the rocks I used as balls.
Thursday, May 5, 2011
A bow to Leafs management
It really shouldn’t be surprising Toronto set a record for attendance at an MME event this is a City that can appreciate getting knocked out early and often.
Jack Layton of the NDP was accused of getting a massage at a bawdy house. The revelations came to light that the massage parlor was offering happy ending when the name of the studio was found in Brett Favres address book.
Love the new TV show Extreme Couponing or as it is known in Canada CFL players go shopping for clothes.
The Pope has given his blessing to former Pope John Paul to become a Saint. What was needed was confirmation of a miracle and it was proven from betting stubs that John Paul correctly picked the 1969 NY Mets to win the World Series.
Now that Osama Bin Laden in gone Canada can turn its attention to finding the Sedin twins.
The news of Osama being killed was delivered to a lot of people while they were at baseball games which caused such a cheer at the Boston Red Sox games that at 1st fans thought the Sox had signed a relief pitcher from Pakistan.
Al Qaida is incensed over the death of Osama saying the shooter should have gotten at least 4 games for the head shot.
The technology reviewers are giving RIM’s Playbook thumbs down calling it harder to access than an NFL playbook.
This weekend is mother’s day or it is known in the NBA “Who’s your daddy?”
The sporting world was rocked with the suicide and oddly ironic death of former pro football player Dave Duerson. Revelations following his death show he was motivated to shoot himself in the stomach in order to donate his brain to head injury research. A spokesperson for Sarah Palin was outraged saying if he really wanted to preserve the meat the correct procedure is to open your neck with a Bowie knife.
Keith Primeau has created a website called stopconcussions.com to educate people on the effects of head trauma. I’m confused does he want the site to get a lot of hits or not?
The leadership of Japan met with people who have been devastated by the earthquake and nuclear meltdown and in a show of contrition bowed deeply in shame. The Toronto Maple Leafs when asked if this was perhaps something management should consider bowed out of the question. If the Maple Leafs management had to bow every time they devastated their fan base they would have to remove the legs from their desks.
Jack Layton of the NDP was accused of getting a massage at a bawdy house. The revelations came to light that the massage parlor was offering happy ending when the name of the studio was found in Brett Favres address book.
Love the new TV show Extreme Couponing or as it is known in Canada CFL players go shopping for clothes.
The Pope has given his blessing to former Pope John Paul to become a Saint. What was needed was confirmation of a miracle and it was proven from betting stubs that John Paul correctly picked the 1969 NY Mets to win the World Series.
Now that Osama Bin Laden in gone Canada can turn its attention to finding the Sedin twins.
The news of Osama being killed was delivered to a lot of people while they were at baseball games which caused such a cheer at the Boston Red Sox games that at 1st fans thought the Sox had signed a relief pitcher from Pakistan.
Al Qaida is incensed over the death of Osama saying the shooter should have gotten at least 4 games for the head shot.
The technology reviewers are giving RIM’s Playbook thumbs down calling it harder to access than an NFL playbook.
This weekend is mother’s day or it is known in the NBA “Who’s your daddy?”
The sporting world was rocked with the suicide and oddly ironic death of former pro football player Dave Duerson. Revelations following his death show he was motivated to shoot himself in the stomach in order to donate his brain to head injury research. A spokesperson for Sarah Palin was outraged saying if he really wanted to preserve the meat the correct procedure is to open your neck with a Bowie knife.
Keith Primeau has created a website called stopconcussions.com to educate people on the effects of head trauma. I’m confused does he want the site to get a lot of hits or not?
The leadership of Japan met with people who have been devastated by the earthquake and nuclear meltdown and in a show of contrition bowed deeply in shame. The Toronto Maple Leafs when asked if this was perhaps something management should consider bowed out of the question. If the Maple Leafs management had to bow every time they devastated their fan base they would have to remove the legs from their desks.
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Concrete Results
The DSM a manual that determines what is a mental illness is classifying grief as a disorder. The classification is in two parts bad grief like the loss of a loved one and good grief which is what Toronto sports fans feel at playoff time.
Don Cherry ended his Easter Show with a shout out to God by saying “You can’t beat Jesus”. This was quickly refuted by a psychic from Sudbury who claimed the spirit of deceased NHL coach and noted video nut Roger Nielson spoke to him. He said Jesus could be beat high to the glove side.
Noted environmentalist and Boston Bruins defenseman Andrew Ference says he was not giving Montreal Canadians fans the finger but in Support of Earth Day was giving the finger to the Alberta tarsands. Later in game 7 Ference gave a Montreal forward the cold shoulder.
Montreal Canadians fans were incensed by the gesture of Bruins Andrew Ference. The PQ quickly capitalized on it by calling the gesture anti French and then demanded Federal funding for a foam finger that could be handed out at the next Bruins game. Instead of #1 the foam finger would have FO for French Only.
Watching Cherry Salute the Queen makes me realize he is about the closest thing we have to royalty in Canada, except he has more hair than the average Prince. Don’s suits were the topic of conversation on the ESPN talk show Around the Horn. This is like suddenly discovering Terry Bradshaw had a concussion or 30.
It seems like NHL hockey is the only sport where robbed is considered part of the statistics. You know wins… losses…robbed… the referee robbed him… the timekeeper robbed him… his manager… you get the idea.
I might be watching too many gang and corruption movies and reading too many newspapers and books but every time I see a controversial call late in a game I immediately try to guess who is being bribed. If I had the skill I know I could download an App that would allow me to track the fixes but I am a bit behind on technology I don’t know what an App is but I’ve been told it is like a VHS.
I feel bad for Nashville because with the Predators winning the team robbed country music lovers of a great somebody done somebody wrong song by Carrie Underwood. They had a couple of really bad calls at the end of game 6 that would have looked great in a video overlaid with Carrie weeping into a roll of gauze.
Teemu Selanie of the Anaheim Ducks is going to have a difficult decision on retiring because as a senior in the NHL health plan with over 20 years he is finally entitled to free dental.
The Royal Wedding is competing with the Stanley Cup playoffs and it is tough to tell who is getting the most coverage. Let’s face it there is not much difference between a shot of people celebrating at a British Pub and a video of an NHL team celebrating a goal. They have the same teeth just different jerseys, Go United!
Don Cherry ended his Easter Show with a shout out to God by saying “You can’t beat Jesus”. This was quickly refuted by a psychic from Sudbury who claimed the spirit of deceased NHL coach and noted video nut Roger Nielson spoke to him. He said Jesus could be beat high to the glove side.
Noted environmentalist and Boston Bruins defenseman Andrew Ference says he was not giving Montreal Canadians fans the finger but in Support of Earth Day was giving the finger to the Alberta tarsands. Later in game 7 Ference gave a Montreal forward the cold shoulder.
Montreal Canadians fans were incensed by the gesture of Bruins Andrew Ference. The PQ quickly capitalized on it by calling the gesture anti French and then demanded Federal funding for a foam finger that could be handed out at the next Bruins game. Instead of #1 the foam finger would have FO for French Only.
Watching Cherry Salute the Queen makes me realize he is about the closest thing we have to royalty in Canada, except he has more hair than the average Prince. Don’s suits were the topic of conversation on the ESPN talk show Around the Horn. This is like suddenly discovering Terry Bradshaw had a concussion or 30.
It seems like NHL hockey is the only sport where robbed is considered part of the statistics. You know wins… losses…robbed… the referee robbed him… the timekeeper robbed him… his manager… you get the idea.
I might be watching too many gang and corruption movies and reading too many newspapers and books but every time I see a controversial call late in a game I immediately try to guess who is being bribed. If I had the skill I know I could download an App that would allow me to track the fixes but I am a bit behind on technology I don’t know what an App is but I’ve been told it is like a VHS.
I feel bad for Nashville because with the Predators winning the team robbed country music lovers of a great somebody done somebody wrong song by Carrie Underwood. They had a couple of really bad calls at the end of game 6 that would have looked great in a video overlaid with Carrie weeping into a roll of gauze.
Teemu Selanie of the Anaheim Ducks is going to have a difficult decision on retiring because as a senior in the NHL health plan with over 20 years he is finally entitled to free dental.
The Royal Wedding is competing with the Stanley Cup playoffs and it is tough to tell who is getting the most coverage. Let’s face it there is not much difference between a shot of people celebrating at a British Pub and a video of an NHL team celebrating a goal. They have the same teeth just different jerseys, Go United!
Monday, April 18, 2011
Head Games
With all of the outrage and discussion on head shots delivered to professional athletes you would think this was the most brutal way to make a living since men were chained to oars and made to pull. Unless I am mistaken the games we play are all about hitting and the head sometimes gets in the way. It is an occupational hazard like smoke is to firefighters, drunken brawls are to police officers and STD’s are to rock stars.
Why are we so concerned about men and women who CHOOSE to play a game and get money, fame and adoration for their efforts? This is not about slave labourers who have no choice or miners that need to feed their family. This is men and women who CHOOSE to make millions and know the risk.
I feel bad for people who suffer concussions but compared to someone who works in a dangerous job and gets injured and then has to try and collect from workman’s compensation, it isn’t even close. Some workers have to take dangerous jobs to feed their families and we don’t have commissions, daily commentary and people pushing for their safety the way we do for millionaire athletes who play a game.
Life is not fair. If you want to play a game for a living the chances are you will get hurt. If you really want me to feel sorry for you take a job cleaning sewers and you will have it. Otherwise accept that you play a game and get paid more in one year than the average person will get in a lifetime. Shut up already and stop believing everything you hear from the talking heads. You are not that hard done by!
Why are we so concerned about men and women who CHOOSE to play a game and get money, fame and adoration for their efforts? This is not about slave labourers who have no choice or miners that need to feed their family. This is men and women who CHOOSE to make millions and know the risk.
I feel bad for people who suffer concussions but compared to someone who works in a dangerous job and gets injured and then has to try and collect from workman’s compensation, it isn’t even close. Some workers have to take dangerous jobs to feed their families and we don’t have commissions, daily commentary and people pushing for their safety the way we do for millionaire athletes who play a game.
Life is not fair. If you want to play a game for a living the chances are you will get hurt. If you really want me to feel sorry for you take a job cleaning sewers and you will have it. Otherwise accept that you play a game and get paid more in one year than the average person will get in a lifetime. Shut up already and stop believing everything you hear from the talking heads. You are not that hard done by!
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Masters 3 wqy 3 hole hayride
I wonder if the Gay and Lesbian Alliance have thought of creating an alternative to the Masters Golf tournament. Same name but give a prize of green cardigan.
When Tiger is in the hunt at the Master the voice of the announcers go up in excitement. Come on already get a booth.
Listening to the commentators it was like they were watching their sons get beat up by a bunch young whipper snappers.
They started to replay Tiger missing a putt to show what he should have done. It was like watching Howie Meeker critique Wayne Gretzky with a telestrator.
Watching Tiger is like a commercial for a Bi-Polar medication. Tiger hasn’t had this many ups and down since last Saturday at his annual 3 hole pre Masters 3 way.
Tiger hasn’t been in so much straw since his annual pre-Master 3 hole 3 way hayride.
Tiger hasn’t uttered as many profanities since his annual pre Masters 3 way 3 hole BBQ was cancelled.
Watching Tiger make a charge on Sunday was unusual for his golf standards but according to his mistresses coming from behind isn’t unheard-of.
The US government almost shut down in a dispute centering on Planned Parenthood. The last large organization to almost shut down due to reproduction issues was the NY Jets.
Jason Day had a shot that averages 340 yards off the tee. The only person known to be longer off the tee was Milton Berle.
Barry Bonds personal trainer is a key witness to the trial over his lying over steroid use. The shopper says she was willing to overlook his being injected with drugs but buying a new hat every week drove her batty.
Edmonton politicians want taxpayers in Alberta to fund a new arena for the Oilers saying it benefits all Albertans. This is true because without the Oilers the Flames start to look uncompetitive.
Upset after her application to attend the leaders debate was denied Green Party leader Elizabeth May invited voters to watch the broadcast with her. This is similar to what Brian Burke of the Toronto Maple Leafs intends to do if his application to include the Leafs in the playoffs is turned down. Burke says the Leafs have millions of fans and must be a part of any national sport playoff for the sake of democracy.
LA Lakers forward Kobe Bryant was in hot water after yelling homophobic slurs during a game this week. The team was incensed saying Kobe has to straighten up.
With the floods in Manitoba becoming severe a call has gone out to Gary Bettman who has shown exceptional skill in sandbagging Winnipeg for years over the return of the Jets.
Iceland has just opened a penis museum which has the largest collection of pricks outside of the Chicago Blackhawks locker room.
There was a scary moment in Calgary when a roof over the dining room of a senior citizens complex collapsed. Officials say the damage could have been worse but most of the Flames had opted out of the optional meal.
Canadian hockey fans should look at the Nashville as they have the kind of team that will remind us of past Stanley Cup contenders like the 2006 Edmonton Oilers, the 2005 Calgary Flames and the 1942 Toronto Maple Leafs.
When Tiger is in the hunt at the Master the voice of the announcers go up in excitement. Come on already get a booth.
Listening to the commentators it was like they were watching their sons get beat up by a bunch young whipper snappers.
They started to replay Tiger missing a putt to show what he should have done. It was like watching Howie Meeker critique Wayne Gretzky with a telestrator.
Watching Tiger is like a commercial for a Bi-Polar medication. Tiger hasn’t had this many ups and down since last Saturday at his annual 3 hole pre Masters 3 way.
Tiger hasn’t been in so much straw since his annual pre-Master 3 hole 3 way hayride.
Tiger hasn’t uttered as many profanities since his annual pre Masters 3 way 3 hole BBQ was cancelled.
Watching Tiger make a charge on Sunday was unusual for his golf standards but according to his mistresses coming from behind isn’t unheard-of.
The US government almost shut down in a dispute centering on Planned Parenthood. The last large organization to almost shut down due to reproduction issues was the NY Jets.
Jason Day had a shot that averages 340 yards off the tee. The only person known to be longer off the tee was Milton Berle.
Barry Bonds personal trainer is a key witness to the trial over his lying over steroid use. The shopper says she was willing to overlook his being injected with drugs but buying a new hat every week drove her batty.
Edmonton politicians want taxpayers in Alberta to fund a new arena for the Oilers saying it benefits all Albertans. This is true because without the Oilers the Flames start to look uncompetitive.
Upset after her application to attend the leaders debate was denied Green Party leader Elizabeth May invited voters to watch the broadcast with her. This is similar to what Brian Burke of the Toronto Maple Leafs intends to do if his application to include the Leafs in the playoffs is turned down. Burke says the Leafs have millions of fans and must be a part of any national sport playoff for the sake of democracy.
LA Lakers forward Kobe Bryant was in hot water after yelling homophobic slurs during a game this week. The team was incensed saying Kobe has to straighten up.
With the floods in Manitoba becoming severe a call has gone out to Gary Bettman who has shown exceptional skill in sandbagging Winnipeg for years over the return of the Jets.
Iceland has just opened a penis museum which has the largest collection of pricks outside of the Chicago Blackhawks locker room.
There was a scary moment in Calgary when a roof over the dining room of a senior citizens complex collapsed. Officials say the damage could have been worse but most of the Flames had opted out of the optional meal.
Canadian hockey fans should look at the Nashville as they have the kind of team that will remind us of past Stanley Cup contenders like the 2006 Edmonton Oilers, the 2005 Calgary Flames and the 1942 Toronto Maple Leafs.
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Babies Unlimited
The trial of Barry Bonds took an interesting turn when prosecutors had chemists try to match his piss while defending council engaged in a pissing match.
Manchester United forward Wayne Rooney was penalized 2 games for swearing after scoring a goal. If the rule was applied to other sports some NHL players would receive the death penalty.
Turned on the NCAA College Basketball final but must have accidentally gotten the renovation channel as all I saw were players tossing up bricks. With scoring like that in College you have to feel sorry for the next batch of NBA groupies. You know the game was boring when Tiger Woods was yelling “In the hole”.
Green Party Leader Elizabeth May is outraged she won’t be allowed to participate in the TV debate with the other leaders. The broadcasters agreed parties must have at least one seat to join in the debate enraging May who said she has a million votes. The cry was taken up by NFL fans who say they have 50 million supporters yet they are not allowed in contract negotiations to save the season.
Top 5 signs it’s almost playoff time in the NHL
# 5 Leafs are making a run
# 4 San Jose sent out their apologies for an early exit to fans
# 3 Edmonton excited to get a new punter for the Eskimos
# 2 Quebec demanding Alberta send money for riot and riot control equipment
# 1 Phoenix Coyotes say sale of club is “eminent”
A study out of the US says women with 2 or more children have different fathers for the children 25% of the time. The statistic goes up in Cities where there is an NBA franchise.
It must be a lingering holdover from being owned by Disney but the Anaheim Duck sure get a lot of Mickey Mouse calls from officials both for and against them.
The NDP, Liberals and Conservatives have all decided not to campaign in Calgary despite the City being the 4th largest in Canada. The leaders say it is common practice to ignore loyal voters saying crediting the idea from watching how Gary Bettman treats Canadian hockey fans.
The Green Party says it will be fiscally prudent and only increase taxes on the oilsands of Alberta. This is known as the Harold Ballard approach to governing named after the late Toronto Maple Leafs owner who sucked all the money out of the team and then did nothing with it .
10 days after the earthquake destroyed nuclear reactors in Japan the Tokyo Electric Power Company submitted plans for new reactors. In a related story the Ottawa Senators management and coaches will meet this week to plan next year’s team.
Telus say they will have the 1st 4G network in Canada by 2012 a claim contested by the CFL who say they have had a network of players making $4G for years.
A Florida civil liberties group upset at government intervention is advising women to incorporate their uteruses to protect them. The resulting rush to become a company has put a run on the names NY Jets Baby Unlimited, Travis Territory LTD. and The Brady Bunch Inc.
Bloc Quebecois leader Gilles Duceppe is urging voters to reject the Conservatives saying they have to protect Canadian values. I agree remembering with fondness my Dad raising me with stories of how Canadians were a people who demanded separation and if that was not possible blackmailed their neighbors and took pensions for fermenting a treasonous agenda. Duceppe advising Canadians how to vote is like getting Mike Millbury to help select your draft picks and trades.
Manchester United forward Wayne Rooney was penalized 2 games for swearing after scoring a goal. If the rule was applied to other sports some NHL players would receive the death penalty.
Turned on the NCAA College Basketball final but must have accidentally gotten the renovation channel as all I saw were players tossing up bricks. With scoring like that in College you have to feel sorry for the next batch of NBA groupies. You know the game was boring when Tiger Woods was yelling “In the hole”.
Green Party Leader Elizabeth May is outraged she won’t be allowed to participate in the TV debate with the other leaders. The broadcasters agreed parties must have at least one seat to join in the debate enraging May who said she has a million votes. The cry was taken up by NFL fans who say they have 50 million supporters yet they are not allowed in contract negotiations to save the season.
Top 5 signs it’s almost playoff time in the NHL
# 5 Leafs are making a run
# 4 San Jose sent out their apologies for an early exit to fans
# 3 Edmonton excited to get a new punter for the Eskimos
# 2 Quebec demanding Alberta send money for riot and riot control equipment
# 1 Phoenix Coyotes say sale of club is “eminent”
A study out of the US says women with 2 or more children have different fathers for the children 25% of the time. The statistic goes up in Cities where there is an NBA franchise.
It must be a lingering holdover from being owned by Disney but the Anaheim Duck sure get a lot of Mickey Mouse calls from officials both for and against them.
The NDP, Liberals and Conservatives have all decided not to campaign in Calgary despite the City being the 4th largest in Canada. The leaders say it is common practice to ignore loyal voters saying crediting the idea from watching how Gary Bettman treats Canadian hockey fans.
The Green Party says it will be fiscally prudent and only increase taxes on the oilsands of Alberta. This is known as the Harold Ballard approach to governing named after the late Toronto Maple Leafs owner who sucked all the money out of the team and then did nothing with it .
10 days after the earthquake destroyed nuclear reactors in Japan the Tokyo Electric Power Company submitted plans for new reactors. In a related story the Ottawa Senators management and coaches will meet this week to plan next year’s team.
Telus say they will have the 1st 4G network in Canada by 2012 a claim contested by the CFL who say they have had a network of players making $4G for years.
A Florida civil liberties group upset at government intervention is advising women to incorporate their uteruses to protect them. The resulting rush to become a company has put a run on the names NY Jets Baby Unlimited, Travis Territory LTD. and The Brady Bunch Inc.
Bloc Quebecois leader Gilles Duceppe is urging voters to reject the Conservatives saying they have to protect Canadian values. I agree remembering with fondness my Dad raising me with stories of how Canadians were a people who demanded separation and if that was not possible blackmailed their neighbors and took pensions for fermenting a treasonous agenda. Duceppe advising Canadians how to vote is like getting Mike Millbury to help select your draft picks and trades.
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