Ships Ahoe

With the problems surrounding lead based products in China no wonder Yao Ming is so reluctant to spend time in the paint.

A recent Poll found people in Saskatchewan were happier than in other Provinces. Sources say the Poll was biased as it was conducted after a Saskatchewan Roughrider win.

There is a simple remedy for all the stick swinging in the NHL, outlaw golfing in the off season. Players are just confused what sport they are playing.

After losing a game 7-1 and then winning the next game 8-1 it appears the Toronto Maple Leafs have added another illness to their list this season Bi-Polar Disorder.

AC Milan Goalie Dida was suspended for 2 games after faking an injury. Officials with Professional soccer were incensed saying if every soccer player who faked and injury was suspended there would be no one left. A furious Dida lashed into the officials in a tirade but was later called out for using cue cards during the rant.

Andy Murray now says there is no problem with fixing of matches in Tennis. He just said there was as part of a bet.

Dallas Cowboys coach Wade Phillips says he doesn’t remember saying the New England Patriots championships were tainted by the spy scandal. This was quickly refuted by Patriots coach Bill Billichick who then offered to show tapes of the comments.

Denver Bronco’s running back Travis Henry is suing the NFL for the right to have his expert present during the evaluation of his “B” sample on suspicion of marijuana use. Although the NFL grants the person is an expert they still are refusing admittance to Snoop Dogg.

Two members of the Minnesota Vikings got into a scuffle that included a chair being thrown. Tempers were cooled off when the players agreed to share the captions duties aboard the next team bonding cruise.