Interesting choice of coach for the Winnipeg Blue Bombers as they replace a crook with LaPolice

England has removed the captaincy from John Terry after revelations he scored an own goal on his teammates girlfriend. This has disrupted the whole WAG (Wives and girlfriend) community in England causing the price of Hermes bags to soar.

I’m curious who fakes more… English soccer player diving on the pitch or the WAGS in their battleground feigning climax

Top 5 rejected Superbowl commercials
# 5 FEMA planning for the past working for tomorrow
# 4 Madame Jacquie’s French Quarter Super Special
# 3 The NBC tie in to Jay Leno at 10:00
# 2 A day in the life of the Budweiser Clydesdale stable boy
# 1 Indianapolis Chamber of Commerce: We’re not as bad off as New Orleans but we could use the tourists as well

During training runs for the Olympic Downhill officials spotted both a bear and a lynx. More concerting however was the number of cougars hanging around the men’s hockey teams.

Jeff Pain of the Canadian Luge team has made allegations the European teams are using magnets to increase the speed of their sleds the only time the words magnetic has been applied to the sport or athletes.

Top 5 signs you may not win an Olympic Winter medal
# 5 Eddie the Eagle calls you a longshot
# 4 You accidentally ate a McDonalds meal before your event
# 3 The cheque you sent to the figure skating judges bounced
# 2 Your countries icemaker doubles as a bartender
# 1 At the start of your 2 man luge run there is a fight to see who goes on top

Olympic Officials were scrambling to save the snow from melting last week with an urgent call for BC residents to donate any spare bales of “hay” they may have from their home grow ops.

NBA officials are proposing a salary cut to players causing a panic in the tattoo, stripper and small arms industries.

It appears the warnings about random drug testing is being heard at the Olympics with BC officials saying it is the 1st time in memory no one from the Province has tested positive.