Men’s Olympic ski jumping kicked off the Games today with competitors hoping to jump a distance greater than the hurdles the women’s team failed to overcome
The heating system in the Olympic Village is partly heated from sewage waste which gives new meaning to having a warm place to take a load off.
The system was not operating at full capacity until the politicians and Olympic family showed up. Now there is more BS that they can process.
Bill Clinton is recovering from heart surgery with his aides saying he never should have been allowed to look at the Sports Illustrated Olympic issue as there was too much spandex.
The VIP box was suspiciously empty at the start of the Opening Ceremonies with officials blaming their absence on, missed connections, travel fatigue and the time it takes to acclimatize to BC Bud.
The empty seats were later attributed to native leaders arriving late which caused every Canadian who has ever attended a Pow Wow to smile knowingly.
The Algerian team came into the ceremony with 1 athlete and 4 officials or as rappers called it an acceptable entourage.
It’s easy to spot the countries that are run by a dictatorship they’re the ones that start with “The Democratic Republic of...”
It must have been a cultural thing but I was confused by the 1 finger salute the Mongolian female skier gave Vancouver PETA representatives as she walked by wearing her fur hat.
If the IOC had tested the native dancers for banned stimulants they probably wouldn’t have made it through the whole ceremony
Wonder if there was more fiddling going on during the opening ceremonies or at the after party
Even now I dream of being a part of the Olympic opening ceremony but all I can aspire to be is the boring old white guy that thanks the sponsors...
In fairness to all the other performers maybe the IOC should have tested KD Lang for female hormones
Standing in reverence to hear the Olympic Hymn was OK but I thought asking the audience to join in the singing of God Save Jacques Rogge was a bit much
The Olympic Ceremony is the ultimate chick flick with the songs, the fashion and at the end the women go to sleep carrying a torch for someone
After all the hype the lighting of the Olympic Torch was botched because someone from the hydraulics team made a Timmies run at the wrong time
It was good to see the homeless of Vancouver included in the ceremony when Gretzky gave the guy a light for his cigarette from the torch
Top 5 signs it is Valentine’s Day at the Olympics
# 5 Chocolate is the performance enhancing drug of choice
# 4 Cupid take a spin around the biathlon track
# 3 Female athletes try on their wind resistant lingerie
# 2 Diamond industry unveils its new slogan “If you want her to believe try 5 diamond rings”
#1 Athletes send cards to gold medals saying please be mine
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