Armageddon a Home Game

In an attempt to throw Boston Red Sox pitcher Josh Beckett off his game the Cleveland Indians had his ex girlfriend Danielle Peck sing the opening anthem and during the 7th inning stretch. Peck stuck to tradition singing God Bless America for the anthem but her 7th inning choice of “Wild Thing” raised eyebrows.

Olympic figure skating champion Scott Hamilton threw out the opening pitch for the 5th game of the ALCS and it was no where near the catcher. Hamilton said in retrospect he should have left the skates at home. Not sure what was more embarrassing his throwing ability or his sequin outfit.

You would think with the number of concussions to NHL players the league would do something about the football shoulder pads being worn by players. A spokesperson for the NHL said they are trying but since the new tighter sweaters were introduced players feared they would look too fat.

Ottawa rookie Nick Foligno jumped for joy over his first NHL goal and later his dad nearly jumped through the TV as he was taken off the ice as a result of a head hit.

South Africa defeated England in the Rugby World Cup finals thus putting an end to the employment of Rugby writers in North America for 4 years. South Africa beat the defending champions 15-6 in the confused scoring system when they converted a try, kicked a penalty and scratched 3 bells in the opening lottery.

A band called The Weakerthans released a song about former NHL goalie Gump Worsley called Elegy for Gump Worsley. Not to be outdone Toronto’s Barenaked ladies have penned a ballad called Eulogy for Thomas Kaberle.

First it was thunder and lightening, then it was hail and gale force wins and now with the Saskatchewan Roughriders clinching a home playoff berth can the end of the world be far off?

Mike Weir won his first tournament in over three years and despite it not being one of the more notable events Weir was happy. Asked what hole gave him the most trouble Weir said it was the one with the windmill.

Cleveland Indians Paul Byrd has admitted using Human Growth Hormones but said he only used it while in the care of a Dr. Upon hearing this Denver Bronco’s running back Travis Henry says he was only using marijuana on the advice of Dr. Feelgood.

Hank Steinbrenner son of Yankee owner George lashed out at outgoing manager Joe Torres for saying the offer to stay in pinstripes was an insult. Showing his dad’s former feistiness Hank is trying to re-sign Joe just so he can fire him.

Not sure if Liberal Leader Stephane Dion gets it but he says the new heated hockey skate is just another sign of global warming. In an effort to try and turn around his flagging numbers Dion is re-naming his dog from Kyoto to Reebok.

Instead of the NHL being so concerned with head shots why not just require the players to wear shoulder pads that have to be smaller than those worn by Mel Gibson in Road Warrior movies. The ‘80’s are over enough with the wide shoulder pads.

The NFL is playing up the almost religious happenings from this week. First Buffalo Bills Kevin Everett was able to walk then Kansas City Chief Priest Holms has come back after severe injuries and now Arizona Cardinal quarterback Matt Leinhart says he is dating a virgin named Mary.

England lost their Euro 2008 match to Russia and now has to pray to Jesus for help from Israel.