July 18 2007

At one point Michael Vick could have run for Governor of Georgia now he would be lucky to get elected dogcatcher.

Asked how his summer was going Vick replied “Ruff”.

The vote to charge Vick was as one juror put it “doggone close”.

Vick had a bone to pick with the system saying locking the jurors up in a room to fight over the evidence was upsetting.

Out of respect for Vick the Falcons have deleted the flea flicker from the playbook.

Surely Vick will now take pause to reflect.

A spokesperson for the UFC says putting animals in a cage and having no holds bar fighting is just plain cruel.

German rider Marcus Burghardt discovered what happens when you hit a dog during the Tour de France…you roll over.

This is the 3rd rider on the same team to be injured resulting in a name change to T-Immobile.

If you were to ask Michael Vick and Marcus Burghardt these really are the dog days of summer.

Listening to Dante Culpepper quote Gandhi upon news of his release from the Miami Dolphins reminds me of another Gandhi quote. “Always aim at complete harmony of thought and word and deed. Always aim at purifying your thoughts and you will be over paid to throw interceptions”.

A football player quoting the pacifist Gandhi is like a porn star citing words from Mother Teresa.

The former coach of Yi Jianlian has stated it would not be in Yi’s best interest to sign with the Milwaukee Bucks saying they already have too many tall players. This directly contradicts earlier reports Yi wouldn’t sign because Milwaukee didn’t have enough short Asians.

Lucky for John McEnroe he doesn’t play tennis any longer because if WTA tennis player Anastasia Rodionova could be forced to default for hitting a ball near some hecklers, John could have gotten life! If that was unsportsmanlike conduct then the orgasmic screams uttered by some of the women should be at least a violation of the privacy act.

The early over under on how many times Jean Van de Velde will be mentioned at this years British Open is 6000. We get it already he hit a bad shot 8 years ago.

The final team standings for the Pan Am games are based solely on the number of gold medals won. This explains why even though the Brazilians have more medals other Countries are waxing them.

Recent statistics show the population of Canada is aging rapidly which could spell doom for the Toronto Argonauts recruiting program.

16 year old hockey sensation John Tavares is not eligible to play professional hockey next year but can sign a qualifying offer with Burger King.