Cincinnati Reds outfielder Ken Griffy Jr. was quoted taking shots at NASCAR saying “How hard can it be to turn left all the time”. This was quickly disputed as non-sense by Lindsay Lohan.
NFL commissioner Roger Goodell’s command to Atlanta Falcons Michael Vick…”Stay”.
You have to know Goodell has trained animals before because after ordering Vick to stay he gave him his pre season salary as a treat.
Rocked by news of riders testing positive for blood transfusions the Tour de France is considering a name change to the IV League.
I was suspicious when the new entry to the Tour de France was called team Red Cross.
Watching spectators run alongside Tour de France riders wearing thongs, devil costumes and nothing, it’s hard to imagine it is the racers testing positive for drugs.
With the Tour de France drug scandal, NFL dog fighting disgrace, NBA refereeing outrage and Barry Bonds MLB circus yesterday was a black day for sports that will forever be known as Tuesday.
Houston Texans Ahman Green has paid a $50,000 down payment on a home for a low income mother in return for getting his number 30 from teammate Jason Simmons. Green will also pay $10,000 for his favorite locker, $25,000 for his choice seat on the bus and $ 30,000 for his lucky parking spot.
Rexall Drugs Billionaire Daryl Katz has promised to spend the maximum amount of the salary cap if his offer to purchase the Edmonton Oilers is accepted. He plans to do this by introducing a new drug that makes the free agents and their wives think they are in Oz.
Katz admits it will be tough to convince players to come to Edmonton but is hopeful the NHL will allow his purchase of a daily non-stop flight to California to count against the cap.
Wouldn’t it be ironic if NBA referee Tim Donaghy was to get off on a technical?
According to NBA commissioner David Stern the only betting referees are allowed to do is on horses. This explains why Donaghy was allowed to place bets on Point Shaver, Beat the Spread and Mafia Squeeze.
Headline: Formula 1’s Scott Speed Bumped
Citing tradition and history MLB commissioner Bud Selig says he will try to be in attendance when Barry Bonds hits the record breaking home run, weather permitting.
Mr. Selig says that citizens of the United States are innocent unless proven guilty or are connected to George Bush and are then innocent despite being proven guilty.
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