8 is E Snuff

Watching the skies open up and lightening strike contributing to an Edmonton Eskimo fumble on a punt should confirm what has been suspected all along, God is a Riders fan.

Lori Kane was chosen by CN to wear a specially designed cap which left her on track to be named wardrobe train wreck of the week.

Sheldon Souray said in an interview he holds no bitter feelings towards the Montreal Canadians and wants to thank everyone on St. Catherine’s street for making his non hockey playing dreams come true.

Kelly Sutherland became the first professional Chuckwagon driver to win 10 world championships and to be on PETA’s 10 most wanted list at the same time. Asked how he felt about the honour Kelly said “I don’t give a radishes ass”.

Scheduling the Canadian Women’s Golf and Tennis championships on the same weekend finally gave guys a chance to get caught up on the yard work. Without many of the top women in the Rogers Cup and no Canadians in the hunt for the CN Open it was possible to ignore two events with our nationalism intact.

Wit 66,000 people on hand for David Beckhams first game in MLS it makes you understand why he is considered such a catch for the league. There haven’t been that many people cheering to see a ball bend like that since Scott Norwood.

Watching the amount of valuable players go down to injury in the NFL pre-season it now makes sense to see why the games are sponsored by Blue Cross. When a guy making $5 million a year has to sit out the whole year because of an injury it gives me a much better understanding of Mona Lisa’s smile.

By not returning to the Saskatchewan-Edmonton football game the CBC was quick to issue a statement expressing regrets saying the person in charge was asleep and his dog ate his cell phone. If the person in charge of sports for the CBC is asleep when one of their nationally televised games is on you would think that would be a wake-up call.

Dale Earnhardt Jr. will not have his number 8 when he changes teams this year due to a dispute with his stepmother. He still is holding out hope to get a number that will appeal to his fans and not require them to take off their socks to count.

Rush Limbaugh the talk show host that was so vehemently against drug use until he was caught using illegal drugs has now moved on to other subjects. By attacking Philadelphia Eagles Quarterback Donovan McNabb Limbaugh has opened up the possibility he is hiding his own blackness or worse yet he is an Eagles fan.

Marco Materazzi now says he told Zinedune Zidane “I prefer the whore that is your sister” which led to Zidanes famous head butting of him. Marco now says he was wrong and actually prefers to whore himself for publicity.

Team USA is worried about their shooting abilities after winding up a training session in which not one shot was fired at a strip club or drive-by.

Manchester United fans went on a drunken riot to protest the teams’ terrible start in European football. It was the worst riot since Manchester fans went on a drunken rampage to celebrate last years’ championship.

The Toronto Blue Jays are nearly out of the playoff race and hope to make it official soon so as not to leave the fans hanging like the Maple Leafs did last year.

PETA has come out with a list of Vegetarian Friendly Ballparks and once again at the top of the list was the B.C. Hempsox.